Research Thursday: When Bright Kids Struggle (Understanding Twice-Exceptional Children)
THE STUDY: Counseling Considerations for the Twice-Exceptional Client
Foley-Nicpon, M., & Assouline, S. G. (2015). Counseling considerations for the twice-exceptional client. Journal of Counseling & Development, 93(2), 202–211. https://doi.org/10.1002/j.1556-6676.2015.00196.x
As a child therapist, I sometimes meet parents who describe their child in ways that seem contradictory:
"She's reading years above grade level, but homework takes hours."
"He can tell you everything there is to know about black holes, but he can't remember to bring home his folder."
"She scores incredibly well on tests, yet writing a single paragraph takes an hour."
If any of these sound familiar, your child may be what professionals call twice exceptional, often shortened to 2e. Many parents have never heard the term, but understanding it can completely change the way you see your child.
What Does "Twice Exceptional" Mean?
A twice-exceptional child is both:
intellectually gifted and
living with a disability, learning difference, or neurodevelopmental condition
That second exception might include:
ADHD
Autism
Dyslexia (reading and/or spelling difficulties) or another learning disability
Dysgraphia (writing difficulties)
Dyscalculia (math difficulties)
Anxiety
OCD
Other developmental or mental health conditions
In other words...
Your child may have an exceptional ability in one area while genuinely struggling in another.
Both are real.
Why Are 2e Kids So Often Missed?
Researchers describe twice-exceptional children as having an uneven developmental profile. This can be challenging because their strengths can hide their struggles—and their struggles can hide their strengths.
A child with remarkable intelligence may compensate for dyslexia for years. Another child with ADHD may appear "average" in school because their giftedness masks the attention difficulties.
Researchers have found that many twice-exceptional children demonstrate exceptional reasoning or verbal abilities while simultaneously struggling with working memory, processing speed, writing, or executive functioning.
It's this uneven profile that often makes twice-exceptional children so difficult to identify.
As a result, adults may see a child who seems:
lazy
unmotivated
disorganized
oppositional
"not trying hard enough"
...when what they're actually seeing is a child whose strengths and challenges exist side by side.
That's why these children are so often misunderstood. They don't fit neatly into either the "gifted" box or the "needs extra support" box—and too often, they don't receive the understanding or support they need for either.
Common Signs Parents Notice
This is where the uneven profile really starts to make sense.
A twice-exceptional child may be working several grade levels ahead academically while still having age-appropriate—or even delayed—skills when it comes to emotional regulation, friendships, organization, flexibility, or executive functioning.
Parents often describe children who:
Read several grade levels ahead but struggle to write a paragraph.
Have an incredible vocabulary but can't remember to bring home their homework.
Can explain the solar system in remarkable detail but melt down when plans change.
Solve complex problems but can't organize their backpack.
Ask deep, thoughtful questions but struggle with friendships.
Have an amazing memory for topics they love but forget everyday tasks.
Understand difficult concepts quickly but need much longer to complete assignments.
Are intensely curious and creative but become overwhelmed by mistakes or perfectionism.
One day they seem years ahead. The next day they can't find their shoes.
Both are part of the same child. And yes—it can feel incredibly confusing to parent a child like this!
What Being 2e Can Feel Like For Kids
Many twice-exceptional children know they're different.
They notice when things come easily for them—but they also notice the things that seem much easier for everyone else.
Because they're so capable in some areas, adults often expect them to be capable across the board. The children often come to expect this of themselves, too. Teachers, parents, siblings, and even the children themselves may think, "If you're smart enough to do this, why can't you do that?"
Over time, children often stop asking, "Why is this so hard for me?" and start telling themselves stories like:
"I'm lazy."
"I'm not trying hard enough."
"Something is wrong with me."
"I'm only smart if everything comes easily."
On the flip side, researchers also found that parents and teachers often reported more emotional and behavioral concerns than the children reported themselves. In other words, some twice-exceptional children may struggle to recognize or explain their own emotional experiences.
The research also found that gifted children with ADHD reported lower self-esteem than gifted peers without ADHD, and children with learning disabilities often showed lower self-concept as well.
The authors also highlight another important consideration: peer relationships. Although research specifically on twice-exceptional children is still limited, gifted students and students with disabilities are both known to experience bullying. Because twice-exceptional children often stand out in more than one way, the researchers encourage parents, schools, and counselors to pay close attention to peer relationships and experiences of bullying.
It's not their intelligence that's causing these emotional challenges. It's trying to live in a world that doesn't always understand the combination of extraordinary strengths and real difficulties.
When Should You Consider an Evaluation?
One of the strongest messages in the research is that accurate identification comes before effective support.
The authors emphasize that because twice-exceptional children often have such uneven profiles, it's important to look at the whole child rather than relying on a single test score or classroom observation. A child may score exceptionally high in one area while showing significant weaknesses in another, making a comprehensive evaluation especially important.
If you've found yourself saying things like:
"I know my child is capable of more."
"None of this quite adds up."
"They seem brilliant in some ways but really struggle in others."
"Teachers keep telling me they're smart, but something still isn't clicking."
...it may be worth talking with your pediatrician, school team, or a psychologist who specializes in comprehensive evaluations (or I can help you with referrals — feel free to email me!).
A thorough evaluation doesn't just look for challenges—it also identifies strengths. The researchers argue that understanding both is essential because it helps families, schools, and therapists create support plans that build on a child's gifts while addressing areas of genuine difficulty.
And sometimes, one of the greatest benefits of an evaluation isn't the diagnosis itself. It's finally having an explanation that helps everyone understand the child more accurately.
How Counseling Can Help
Counseling isn't about "fixing" giftedness or making a child less different. It's about helping them understand themselves.
In therapy we might work on:
managing anxiety
building healthy self-esteem
reducing perfectionism
strengthening emotional regulation
developing executive functioning strategies
learning self-advocacy skills
helping parents better understand how their child's brain works
One important takeaway from the research is that interventions work best when we build on a child's strengths—not just focus on their weaknesses. Comprehensive evaluation and treatment should consider both exceptional abilities and areas of difficulty, rather than trying to "average out" the child. They also emphasize that 2e children should continue to receive opportunities to develop their gifts, even while receiving support for areas of difficulty.
As a therapist, I couldn't agree more.
A Final Thought
One sentence kept coming to mind while reading this research:
Twice-exceptional children aren't contradictory—they're complex.
When we stop asking,
"Why can't they?"
and start asking,
"How does this child's brain work?"
we make room for compassion, appropriate support, and confidence to grow.
The goal isn't to make a twice-exceptional child more typical. The goal is to help them understand themselves, build on their strengths, and develop the support they need to thrive
Think You May Be Parenting a 2e Kid?
Here are some excellent resources you can check out:
Twice-Exceptional Kids: Both Gifted and Challenged (Child Mind Institute)
Guides to Twice Exceptional Students (Davidson Institute)
And if you're looking for counseling support for your child, feel free to explore my Child Counseling page or schedule a free 15-minute consultation call to explore working with me.